On Cleaning

I'm basically just posting this to kill time because I've devoted today to putting "certain" elements of the apartment in order, including the bedroom.

I have a secret jealousy of people whose things all have a dedicated place, even the telephone and internet cords. Everything is neat and perfect, and there is never even any dust. I keep thinking that someday I'll morph into that person if only I can find a "dedicated space" for this pile of business cards I recently accumulated, for example.

But it's complicated. I'm staring at the business cards now, that great grand pile of "things that are potentially important," and there doesn't seem to be an immediate solution. The probability is high I will never look at that pile again. But what if one day I need a name in there? I'll hate that I cast it aside like so much junk mail.

I can extend the time frame of how long I can contemplate this quagmire by taking little pieces of paper to the trashcan, one scrap at a time, which is technically still productive.

(Also, I am Spotlighting things on my computer to stick in the bin. I love emptying the Mac bin.)

On days like this there's a vague memory that replays in my mind. It is so resonant that it's managed to survive in my recollectable archives, but so old that I realised today I can think about it without knowing I'm thinking about it. It has lived with me too long, like a dull ache you forget to be unhappy about.

Humor me ››

Visualizing the BP Oil Spill

Over France:

Humor me ››

Probably Not the Wisest Use of $250 Grand

There's a reason why "SciFi" is written the way it is, and I'm 99% sure I don't have to explain it, but I'm going to anyway: it's short for "science fiction," a genre that produces either fond or repelled chills, depending on who you're discussing it with.

I dig sci fi. As a kid, the Sci Fi Channel was one of my stand-bys. Which is at least one reason why NBC Universal's decision to rebrand the network as "SyFy" is so offensive: there's no way even Geek Me, who can deal with a lot of unreasonable backstory, is going to get behind that. It's a cheap evolution that prioritizes sound over meaning; a step backward, not forward.

The company paid one Michael Hinman $250,000 for the SyFy Portal website, using a shell company to keep the price reasonable, though I can't imagine why in fucking all-hell you'd spend even a handful of dollars to change a logical -- albeit stale -- brand name into a cheap phonetic soundbite.

Also, cherry-on-cakin' it here, what poverty-ridden mind came up with "Imagine greater"? I get that now we're all trying to be minimalist chic with our slogans, but somebody needed a thicker thesaurus. (Or greater imagination. Heh. See what I did there?)

Palm Pre's 'Flow' Leads Nowhere Nice

These two ads round out Modernista!'s "Go with the Flow" campaign for Palm Pre. I reviewed the debut spot on Adrants. In it, actress Tamara Hope sits on a rock, manipulating the features on her phone while an armada of monks respond in unison to her every toggle.

I wasn't keen on this spot, but I was willing to roll with it. Problem is, things worsened thereafter. In the ads above, the actress feels less and less like a person; more and more like ... I don't know, an android? A minion for the Oasis Project?

Shit really hits the fan with the juggling spot, where it doesn't even vibe like she's trying to be relatable anymore. Hope's as scary as possible, short of her head spinning 360 degrees. As a result, would-be Palm Pre users are reacting in reciprocally psychotic ways.

I heard about the slow progression of Palm Pre's campaign into the weeds from three sources, each of which seemed shaken as hell. When you're living abroad and divided from your dearest by a nine-hour time difference, that's a lot of people reaching out just to freak about an ad.

Why the strong sentiments? It's not just that the work seems Zoloft-enhanced; it's also because:

a) A perfectly good phone, one we were excited about (because look how cool!), is being ruined.

b) Sprint already had a good campaign that everybody liked, Sprint Now, featuring the Palm Pre. Nobody understands why Palm didn't just ride that wave. The work was relevant and witty, investing Palm Pre with a crisp persona without inviting comparisons to Apple's iPhone.

Check out the difference:




Modernista! and Palm, are you paying attention? Change tack before this coffin's sealed shut.

The Internet is Finally Ponying Up.

With help from its loyal and faithful servant, Promotions Co-ordinator Rick Komar.

I have this secret fear that letters like this still exist because some small but sufficient percentage of the populace actually goes, "HEY, I WON THE INTERNET LOTTERY!" and fills out the little form in earnest, waiting with bated breath for CLAIMS AGENT Thomas Ward to call.

But I hope this sentiment is irrational, like that clown thing, and I'm totally wrong.